Sure, he's great...which one is he?

We got a Christmas card and photo today from a family that I see every week at church and it was a good thing because I had forgotten what they looked like since Sunday.

What I needed was the kids names. I don’t have a clue. The only one I know the name of is the kid that said “poo-poo” (I’m still unsure if there was malice intended, but it hurt her feelings) to Gracie. I’m keeping an eye on him. He may need his something or other kicked soon.

The other kids in the photo haven’t sworn at me, stolen my property or done anything extraordinary or very interesting, so I don’t know their names.

If they came up to me an introduced themselves, fine. But otherwise, why should I be responsible for knowing their names? Am I to sneak around and try to overhear it from their friends or parents? And parents just talking about their kids doesn't help me recognize them...it's not a newscast with b-roll (tv lingo)...it's more like radio with a bad play-by-play man.

I know kids are special to their parents and I am no less proud of mine than the proudest of the proud. But I don’t expect mine to be special to you.

But if you’ve got one I need to meet, send him/her over. I don’t bite.

Psst...I got something to tell ya...

The cops are going to sit and try to catch people drinking and driving near Pleasant Run Road on December 20 from 9:00 to 11:00 pm.

This isn’t some inside information I have, this is public information. The cops came by today and asked us to announce it.

This, I’m told, is how it is done. It’s the law around here, the cops have to make it public where they are going to be. I guess somebody sued (and won) once upon a time.

But, I don’t suppose it does any harm to the law enforcement effort. I guess if you are out drunk on that night, it probably slips your mind that the cops are going to be waiting for you at that spot. Or maybe these people listen to other stations. I don’t know.

I’d like to figure out how to make some money from this, but I think selling the information (instead of just announcing it) might be illegal. And I have no idea where they’d be hiding to try to catch me doing that.

Today's Post or What I Did in Between the Weather and Sports

I almost read Thoreau’s Walden or Life in the Woods once.

My senior quote (for college) I quoted Thoreau…”Whoso be a man be a non-conformist.” Then I found out that a few others used it too. I guess I should have used, “Yikes and away!” by Daffy Duck.

Anyway, I’ve always appreciated that Thoreau named his book both “Walden” and (or if you prefer) “Life in the Woods.” It gave the prospective reader a chance to size up what the book was about before deciding to read it.

This needs to be done for a few more books.

David Copperfield or Over Three Hundred Pages without a Point by Charles Dickens
Moby Dick or The Cure for Insomnia by Herman Melville
Oliver Twist or Over Four Hundred Pages without a Point by Charles Dickens
Crime and Punishment or Just Punishment if You Read it by Fyodor Dostoevsky
My Life or Even a Dirt-Bag Can Become President by Bill Clinton
The Leatherstocking Tales or Even the Teacher Won’t Read This by James Fenimore Cooper
As I Lay Dying or What I Write Now that I’m Famous and have no Quality Standards by William Faulkner

And finally, I wish to announce I’m changing the name of my blog to: Cayenne Lemonade or The Painful Results of the First Amendment

If I don't post tomorrow, you'll know what happened...

I may have mentioned this (or not) but I do the daily news here at the station. It’s about 15 minutes or so on a good day…but today it may be all of five minutes unless something happens soon. And three of that will be commercials.

The sports teams don’t play until tomorrow night and I did the Tuesday results yesterday. Even the weather is boring.

I drove around town for a bit, but saw nothing. I stopped at the convenience store and got a Pepsi and some beef jerky. I went to the barber shop and eavesdropped for a few minutes.

Still nothing.

When I got back to the office, the top stores remained:
1. A local charity is offering pictures of pets (yours) with Santa.
2. The Fire Department is giving away smoke detectors and batteries.
3. The post office is open.

I may have to go out and commit a crime.

Now that I'm back from washing my hands again...

I’ve often wondered what it would be like to be obsessive-compulsive.

To be fixated and have no other fixation. To be totally focused on one aspect of life or something and not be able to break it, even if you wanted to.

To just think, each waking moment about one particular thing, with no other ideas filtering in or out.

To have one goal or need that dominates all others.

To be fixated and have no other fixation. To be totally focused on one aspect of life or something and not be able to break it, even if you wanted to.

To just think, each waking moment about one particular thing, with no other ideas filtering in or out.

To have one goal or need that dominates all others.

To be fixated and have no other fixation. To be totally focused on one aspect of life or something and not be able to break it, even if you wanted to.

To just think, each waking moment about one particular thing, with no other ideas filtering in or out.

To have one goal or need that dominates all others.

I’ve often wondered about this.

Tabula Rasa...

I won't pollute the blogosphere with bad posts...well, not today that is...

These were my best ideas/things for today...and I'm not going to write about them, as they are not up to the quality I've come to expect from myself.

I saw a cat cross the street yesterday....
John really likes to close the dishwasher....
The carpeting is off green or maybe is it blue? I can't decide...
I work in an office with wood paneling...
Salt and vinegar potato chips make my fingers feel funny...
Is BBQ a word or an acronym?
My printer is out of ink....
I can't always remember the difference between the "star" and the "pound" signs...
and
Why is it so hot in here?

If I come up with some real ideas, I'll be in touch...

And of course..."you'll shoot your eye out, kid"

I saw for the first time (this Christmas season) last night the movie, “The Christmas Story,” the one about the kid that wants a Red Rider BB gun so bad it’s killing him and his quest to get one for Christmas.

The movie has so many funny scenes and it is quite quotable.

“My dad was a turkey junkie…”, for instance.

Anyway, I have a friend that loves this movie. I worked with him for a few summers and even that far from the normal viewing time, we still laughed about it.

He’s in prison now and won’t get out until 2013 or so.

I’ve always imagined prisoners as being ruthless haters of all things good, like puppies and good (mostly) wholesome entertainment. I’ve had to change my mind about that. He made a mistake that will cost him his freedom for a while.

I hope he gets to watch it this year.

Deja vu...

Seven or eight years ago, when I lived in North Carolina, my boss asked me to write down all the things I did at the office, in order to ensure that I wasn’t being overloaded.

I told him that I’d like to, but I didn’t have time.

(it was a joke…he laughed)

See you tomorrow.

Scott has gone where the fishes is....

I was leaving an office supply store/bookstore today when I saw a familiar sight.

It was a sticky-note that said: “Back in 5 minutes.”

It wasn’t on the door, but next to the door, where it would be handy in case the owner needed to step out for a minute (or 5). It’s a common thing in a small town, with businesses having just one or two employees.

The reason it is such a familiar sight is that we have quite a few of these (in waiting) at the station. We have, of course, “back in 5 minutes” and the “back in one hour” for when we go to lunch. We have our cell phone numbers posted on the door in case of emergency.

Sometimes we need a note on the door even when we are here, such as an “on the air” and “ball game in progress” so people will know not to barge in on us while we are doing the news or when we are in the control room running the board (radio lingo).

We have the “office closing at 2:30” the “office closing at 3:30” and the rarely used “office closing at 1:30, if it opens at all” sign.

There’s the “went to the post office” (it’s across the street) and the “getting a haircut” (it’s across the street also). The idea is that if someone needs to talk to you, they can cross the street and find you.

My father-in-law used to have a nifty rhyme about going fishing on his office door a couple of days per week. Something about the grass has riz. (meaning risen...a sign of spring)

A few more will cover everything...I'm adding:
“Ran out for a Pepsi and a bag of Chester’s Flaming Hot Fries”
“Paying speeding ticket at courthouse”
and the occasionally necessary….
“Toilet Seat Down!”

And that 106 I rolled on National Television...

I’m having a writer’s block.

(Or maybe I’m not a writer and this could be called a radio station owner’s block)

It’s snowing outside right now and I could write about the first time I drove in the snow. A guy had started up a hill and then tried to turn around and got stuck across BOTH lanes. I saw him as I crested the hill. The guy in front of me slid into the ditch. I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to stop my 1977 Plymouth Horizon down such a steep hill, but crashing into the guy’s truck helped me stop about halfway down.

This month is Christmas and I could write about the bowling ball I once got for Christmas and all the high games I rolled with it until an ankle injury ruined my dreams of a professional career.

Today is Monday and this could jog my memory of the Monday I went to a bar and watched football.

But I guess I’ll write about Gracie finding out last night that her favorite food “chicken” and the cute little animal called a “chicken” are in fact, the same thing, at different steps in their "life." This may change her dietary habits for a little while.