Don’t get me wrong, the hospitality and caring nature of Southern women is a wonderful thing. If someone is in the hospital or the cable goes out, a group of ladies get together and bring over a casserole.
I believe this tradition started before it was discovered you could microwave hot dogs.
And while I love tradition, I think we can tweak this a little. So I have composed a letter.
Dear Ladies,
I very much appreciate your willingness to help with food while my wife is in the hospital. However, I believe your charity could be focused somewhere else that would be more useful at this point. Below is a list of things we would love your help with during our time of difficulty.
1. There is a lot of debris in the yard from the last seven or eight storms we have had. If you could bring a wheelbarrow and a truck, I don’t think it would take you more than two or three hours.
2. I’m going to go watch Monday Night Football at the Buffalo Wild Wings this week. The kids need to be bathed and in bed by 8:00. I’ll be back around 11:30 or so.
3. Change the oil on the car.
4. I think there is a dead raccoon in the crawl space under the house. The cover-alls (if you don’t have your own) are in the hall closet.
5. The day you come, call me when you are on the way…I may need you to pick up a six-pack of beer.
Again, thanks for thinking of us in our time of need.
Sincerely,
