How to remove pet odor from room where previous owner of house had a pack of animals (or at least one very incontinent and smelly one).
Ingredients/Supplies needed:
Baking Soda
White Vinegar
Dishwashing Detergent
3% Hydrogen Peroxide
Propane Torch
Cell Phone
Directions:
Pour the baking soda liberally on the area. Add White Vinegar until it is a thick paste. When the paste hardens, cover with dishwashing detergent. Immediately add Hydrogen Peroxide. Ready the Propane Torch and set flame to medium high.
After two or three minutes or when the peroxide is no longer bubbling, light the overstuffed armchair in the room on fire with the propane torch. Retreat from the house immediately.
After 10 minutes, use the cell phone to call the Fire Department and your Insurance Agent.
If the above method is not feasible, you may try two others.
Alternate Method:
Smoke one cigar per day in the affected room.
Alternate, Alternate Method:
Recruit the International Museum of Limburger Cheese to open a satellite exhibit in the affected room.
Next in the series: Disposal of Dentures Left Behind by Previous Owner in Two Easy Steps.
